some sadness

It's no secret that I'm a huge fan of Vanesaa Valencia,  the artist who hosted last weekend's Mad Tea Party. A quick look around my blog and you can see how much I'm inspired by her mad whimsical world.

The last few months Vanessa shared the heartache of discovering that one of her beloved fur babies was very ill and had precious little time left. Today I went to visit her blog and learned her sweet dog Baby had sadly passed away. Through it all she still created an amazing tea party post and didn't let us down. But she was suspiciously absent during the party and I think many of us had a feeling something might be going on. And there was. My heart truly aches for her and I wish her love and healing through this sad time.

a wish of a different kind...

I'm an animal person. I have a soft spot for all four legged creatures and for kitty cats in particular.I can't imagine a life without a little furry baby to share conversations, late nights and buttered toast with. My own little Luna warms my heart everytime she looks at me with her big green eyes. I love how she waits for me to turn in for the night no matter how late (or early in the morning). She gets up from whatever spot she decided to curl up in and with sleepy little eyes follows me to bed. I never have to call her. This is our nightly routine. If there truly are angels on earth I believe our pets are as close as they come.

Vanessa's loss opened up a hurt that I've been nursing for the past 6 months. It's never gone away because everyday I 'm still reminded that someone is missing from my life. My little Kushka, the Maine Coone you see on my side bar passed away at the tender age of 3 1/2 after a battle with a cancerous tumor she developed from a feline leukemia vaccine. She would have been 4 this month. Everything around me reminds me of her. Especially Spring because I knew last year's Spring would be the last one we would have together. She left us on a beautiful sunny December day. I was left with a haunting heartache that remains even today.

I told myself I wouldn't share sad personal stories here. I wanted this to be a happy place readers could  escape to. There's already enough sadness in the world. But I had to have a page for her. If only to ease my own sadness. So I tucked away a little story about my Kushka and you would only find it hidden in my other About Me page if you happened to look. (The one with my picture) Today the pain of having of say goodbye much much too soon all came back.

I know Vanessa may never visit here. I'm just one of the the hundreds of happy souls she's touched with her art and stories. But I couldn't help but shed tears as I read her post. Tears for her loss and tears that reminded me of mine. Her story touched more of us than she'll ever know.

If you're a pet person you probably know this sorrow all too well. And yet there's always another fur baby waiting to be loved. Always. And we take a chance and love unconditionally for as long as they bless our lives with their presence and we feel heartwrenching sorrow when we have to say goodbye. We know we will always love them long after they're gone and we willingly love again. Because this special kind of furry love is a gift and it seems, to me anyway, that it's nothing less than pure bliss.

For my Kushka, BT and Pye
...and for Baby


Leanne said...

I'm so sorry for your loss of Kushka, and equally for Vanessa's loss, as well. Thinking of you . . .

apinkdreamer said...

hi from greece! i'm a great fun of yours! so please take a look at a story i wrote about animals'heaven.
i did it for a little boy who lost his pet fish!
maybe this will soften your pain!!!